let's get retarded in here

feeling uneasy & anxious today. something's got to change.

admittedly, i have the patience of a fruit fly.

but post-pilates yesterday, we were all sitting around discussing the economy, the way the super-rich are manipulating the poor - through technology, drug testing, money, precious metals, etc - and all the current scams.

and i was drained.

i just wanted to go shopping. i want to see bright colors and shiny objects. i want sparkling party dresses and high-heeled shoes. i want a week in disneyworld where absolutely everything is clean and happy and insignificant.

suddenly, after a year, i was desperate to go into a department store, a huge, glistening emporium of gifts and pleasure. i want to be distracted and entertained on a scale so large and insincere it brightens up all the dark, depressing corners of my mind. even it's only temporary.

this is why, if you're a retailer, it's so important to say, "oh look, we've got all this fun stuff! come see!" it's important to be the retail equivalent of a movie like "knocked-up" or "pineapple express" - so incredibly amusing and silly and smiling that you brighten everyone's mood - without leaving them with the sour feeling of having been scammed or driven into debt in the aftermath. (because then they won't come back).

that's the rising appeal of places like topshop or designer collaborations with target, wal-mart & kohl's - it's a carnival, it's ethereal, immediate and fabulous - but you always feel you've had value for your limited funds.

that's what i want right now.

a cheap thrill.